How To Pick Up Drunk Girls

The wonderful thing about drunk girls is that they will believe anything you tell them. You can tell them, "The earth is made of beef jerky," and they will believe you. You can tell them, "I am the heir to the throne of all the Russia," and they will believe you. You can tell them, "I am not really ugly. This is only a mask," and they will believe you. The only real trick to picking up drunken girls is not doing what offends them.

What Offends Drunk Girls

You really have to go to extremes to offend drunken girls. And the drunk a girl is, the more extreme you have to be. Nothing is certain, of course, but there is a pretty good chance that you will offend a drunken girl if you do any of the following things. So if you want to pick up a drunk girl, never:

1. Complain that the music is too loud, then try to plug your ears with her breasts.

2. Tell her that she reminds you of your ex-wife, "Rhinoceros-face".

3. Hold up a bar of soap and say, "I'd like to introduce you to something you've probably never tried before."

4. Tell her you love her because you've got a thing for girls with enormous feet.

5. Say you have an uncontrollable urge to be with her because you're having a fat attack.

Likewise, there are certain things which you can do which will enhance your chances of picking up drunken girls. You just have to know what drunken girls like.

What Drunk Girls Like

Drunken girls like to be dazzled by wit. They like to be flattered unmercifully, and they like to be engaged in inane conversation. So, the next time you want to pick up a drunken girl, walk up to her and say...

1. "Tonight we have a date with destiny, tomorrow we have a date with fate, the day after that I have to be out of town, but when I get back we have a date with history."

2. "Hey, what a terrific body. It reminds me of a beautiful automobile; great wheels, luxurious padding, spectacular headlights. Mind if I take it out for a spin?"

3. "If you're not doing anything later on, maybe we could go back to my place and name your breasts."

4. "I found this tongue lying on the floor. Is it yours?"

5. "You're a dirty person. I can tell."

10 Skills Every Man Should Have

The definition of being a man has changed drastically over the centuries. From he who can kill the buffalo, to he who can afford the most slaves, to he who can afford the tickets on the 50-yard line. The following ten points are the most important skills a man can have to survive in modern society.

10

Score a Baseball Game

Attention to detail and knowledge of the game are vital in the ability to properly score a game. Knowing that a runner touching home scores a run is not enough. A man should be able to document in only a few letters, numbers, and symbols everything that he sees happen from the first pitch to the final out. You should also be able to explain why “BB” means walk.

9

Build a Fire

This seemingly basic skill is often overlooked by those who never joined the Boy Scouts. The skill was fine-tuned centuries ago, but one can never be sure when he will have to provide a fire for warmth, to cook, or for sheer pleasure. Start with small dry twigs in the shape of a teepee, and slowly build up to larger pieces of wood. Don’t smother it, but don’t let too much air in.

8

Tie a Tie

Imagine waking up the day of an important meeting or interview, showering, getting dressed, and then not being able to tie the tie. The open collar look might work for some of us, but for most it will simply look sloppy. There are plenty of videos on youtube to help you out. Personally I use a little cheat-sheet given to my grandfather by a department store in the ‘50s. Some things just don’t change with time. Looking good is one of them. I recommend learning the “four in hand” method as it is the simplest – the adventurous might want to try a full windsor. Be sure to have a dimple in the tie (as is visible in the picture above).

7

Hold Their Own in Any Sport

Whether in the pool hall or a volleyball game at the company picnic, no one wants to lose. More importantly, no one wants to look like an idiot. As they say, you can’t win them all, but you can keep yourself from being embarrassed. A man should know the basic skills of every major sport, football, basketball, soccer, baseball, hockey, and various forms of non athletic games such as poker, pool, and fishing. Also, one should be able to explain the rules and basic skills of any of these competitions to any woman who asks.

6

Car Maintenance

Every man has been in this situation: On a date with a cute girl, when suddenly the car stops working. She looks at you with those wide eyes, assuming you know how to fix it. Surprise ladies, we are not all mechanics. However, a man should be able to change a tire, jump start a car, recognize any fluids in the car, and be able to get the car to someone who can fix it, while not showing weakness in front of his lady.

5

Wingman

As a man, you have certain responsibilities to your friends. Possibly the most important one is to help him get laid. It may involve starting the conversation, or even distracting the less desirable friend. You should be able to accept anything short of long-term physical injury in order to help a buddy out. These acts should be rewarded for their bravery and must be re-paid.

4

Converse

A good conversation is almost an art form. The ability to be interesting and charismatic without dominating a conversation is a skill reserved for the real men amongst us. A man should have a good joke on hand, as well as a supported opinion of most current events, from the threat of Iran as a nuclear power to the Pacers’ need for a starting center.

3

Basic first aid

CPR, the Heimlich maneuver, dressing cuts, scrapes, burns, and bruises, are all invaluable skills that could benefit you to know. It could mean the difference between life and death, or simply make you more comfortable. The possible importance of these skills can not be understated. Knowing these skills will also keep you from panicking if the situation should arise. It will keep everyone safer and can save lives.

2

Fix things

As Clint Eastwood said in Gran Torino, “WD-40, a vice grip, and a roll of duct tape. Any man worth his salt can fix almost any problem with this stuff alone”. Most household problems, from squeaky doors to dripping faucets, can be fixed easily by anyone with a clue. Fixing things by yourself will save you money and be more satisfying than calling in a professional.

1

Cook

Long gone are the days of hunting and gathering, where any food was considered good food. A real man should know his way around a kitchen and be able to cook a good meal now and again. When in the company of others, ramen and poptarts do not count. Check out some of our previous lists for some tips and ideas.

Why do men watch porn

On looking through a whole load of agony aunt pages it is clear that there are many women who have become very distraught on discovering that their husband/partner was watching porn.

They ask advice on how to deal with this? They ask whether it is normal for them to feel so bad? And in general one gets the impression that these women have lost a lot of their confidence. They wonder whether their partner still loves them and while the whole issue doesn't seem to have much importance to the men, it seems to play very heavily indeed on the women because they can't understand why men should need to look at other women if they are indeed happy at home.

We seem to come back again to that saying (taken from the book) that women come from Venus and men from Mars because it is so true that men and women are so different.

Usually, and I repeat usually, (because every woman is different and some women can cope quite okay with these situations) a woman places love and sex under the same heading. In other words she won't be happy to have sex with a man unless she is in love with him, but on the other hand a man, being a different species, can divide sex and love and not think much of having just plain sex with no love involved at all.

It seems that when men watch porn it is merely used as an aid for relieving stress and satisfying a physcial need similar to that of needing to go to the bathroom. There is no emotion there, there is no need to worry about the feelings of anyone else but it is just a mechanical function void of anything else and proves that they can easily separate sex from love but women can't seem to understand this.

A woman starts to wonder whether he might in actual fact not be satisfied with the sex that she is able to provide him with, which is where she begins to lose confidence in herself, but here again the difference between men and women is revealed.

After the honeymoon period (usually two or three years) the sexual appetite of a woman tends to calm down. She may have started a family, have to look after the kids, the home and may even go out to work. Sex is no longer the number one thought on her mind as her mind is filled with so many other things. Whereas the man (so long as he is below the age of 60) still has sex on the brain for quite a considerable part of the day and night and especially first thing in the morning, even before he is fully conscious!!!!!!!!!!!!! So he just needs to relieve this automatic physical urge. It is just physical.

Maybe a way of easing the pain of women (who have sons) is to think back to when they discovered for the first time that their sons were masturbating. What did they think to themselves? The most logical thing to have thought was that this was the natural instinct of a young boy growing up. But what they should also have said to themselves is that this natural instinct will never go away. Once it starts, it's for good, whether they stay single or they get married, and at times they will need to watch porn in order to stimulate themselves. But it's hardly ever because they don't love their wives/partners any more.

When a couple can't have a child normally and have to go for artificial insemination, the procedure requires that the man introduce his sperm into a flask so that this sperm can later fertilize the egg of the woman and once done implanted into the womb of the woman. This is done in a clinic and the first thing that the nurses do is to escort the man into a private room where he will find playboy magazines and porn videos for him to watch.

The clinic knows that he will need these in order to get himself aroused in order to relieve himself. And what's more his wife or partner also knows and understand this in fact she knows that he is doing all this precisely for her, so that she can have the baby that she is longing for.

So on closing I would advise all women to first try and turn a blind eye on what their partners are doing and secondly to thank themselves that all these other women that they are looking at are not in 3D!!!!!

Why some men prefer Older Woman?

Older Woman Younger Man Relationships

Older woman with younger man romance or marriage is not a matter of awe anymore. Many men have found love, harmony and happiness with older women. Nowadays age is no more a criteria when it comes to matters of the heart. Earlier that was not the case and the woman involved in such a relationship was considered a ‘cradle snatcher’. Actually what makes guys attracted to older woman? The below mentioned may be some reasons or benefits of having a older woman as partner.

• Maturity and Confidence: The older women bring a sense of maturity and confidence into the relationships. Older Woman has more experience with men and is more stable compared with younger women and men feel more comfortable with them. Young women tend to be more fickle minded compared to mature women. Mature women know what they want and are much responsible in handling relationship. Older women by default bring more life experiences into the relationship and therefore nurture the growth of their partner without trying to be in command of the relationship.

• Older women are taboo: This factor makes young men attracted to them. Our Society is used to see older men and younger woman more than the other way round and thereby offer more acceptance to such relationships. The normal tendency of people is that they want what they cannot have or what is a ‘forbidden fruit’.

• Lesser Competition: Young women may have several men chasing after them. Older women offer an alternative. Also to an older woman a young man feels more attractive and boost to her ego that she tends to shower her attraction on him. Also there are many liberated and attractive older women known colloquially as ‘cougars’ hunting for younger guys in places like the internet or bars looking for some fun life of a single and are easily available.
• Taking Charge: Young men do not have much experience with women and may not know what to expect with women. And it helps to have ‘take charge’ kind of women as a partner who has already been in the same situation earlier. Many people also agree to the fact that sex gets better with age and getting an experienced partner is considered a plus because older women know what they want and they have experience towards pleasing a man. Older Woman also mostly takes care of the fact that they don’t get pregnant by using contraceptive pills to protect them.

• Intelligent and Confident: People gain more confidence as they grow older. Many young men find older woman attractive as tend to be less superficial. A conversation with an older woman can be interesting and intellectual whereas majority of younger woman tend to be silly, immature and sometimes shallow.
• Independence: Majority of Older women is financially independent and has successful careers. Men like it when his partner is self-sufficient and self-supportive and don’t need him to take care of her.

• The need for Mothering: It is said that all males have a child in them. An Older woman can easily fulfill that need in them.
• Attraction and Love: While some may find it odd that some young man surrounded by girls his age would find an older woman attractive. This is because they many older women are attractive and may even find romance or love in them. How many men can resist 40+ women like Uma Thurman or Mimi Rogers or the Indian actress Maduri Dixit?

10 Things Men Dont Like About Women

10 THINGS MEN DONT LIKE ABOUT WOMEN

1. QUESTIONS

A man hates when a woman starts asking questions about everything, they dont go to the point, they like to play around with questions, to see if they can get you to confess something you did, its often known as trick questions, and only a few man know their way out of a non-stop questionaire of a woman.

  2. TAKING FOREVER TO GET READY

Is there a thing a guy hates is waiting, guys have no patience what so ever, especially when is time to go out and a woman spends hours changing clothes and trying different stuff, a man hates when a woman takes time for every little action they take.

  3. EMOTIONAL SHOULDER

Men dont like when woman treat them as another girlfriend or talk about feelings with them, men dont like to be treated as emotional support.

  4. OPINIONS

Guys dont like when a women ask them for opinions especially when is girl related, examples are DO I LOOK FAT IN THIS? SHOULD I WEAR THIS ONE OR THIS ONE? and those are the most commons and most hated ask questions from women to men.

  5. SEX WEAPON

Men hate when a women uses sex as a weapon, when they want to get something out of the man, or use excuses to punish a man by not having sex, that is one of the most hated it things known to men.

   6. SHOPPING

Shopping with a girl has to be one of the worst punishments a guy could get, they simply cannot decide for anything, and they have to try every single piece to see if they like it, men do not have the patience for this and we including me know that 24 hours is not enough for a woman to go out and buy a pair of panties.

   7. TALKING

Women are natural talkers, they can spend hours and hours talking non-stop about the same thing, and men hate this, they simply cannot stand a woman go on and on and on about something, specially when they talk about themselves.

   8. CRITICISM

Men don't like a woman criticizing or judging another woman, we think is unnecessary and treat other women as rivals or criticize other women's clothes, shoes and pretty much anything they dont like on them.

   9. SILENT TREATMENT

This another most hated things from women known to men, the silent treatment is a stage a girl uses to not talk or even look at you while you try to talk or explain something to them, its like a man doesnt exist to them and it could go on for days.

 10. GOOD MEMORY

Is there one thing we men hate is the women's good memory to bring back past mistakes we men made, they can remember the details and every time a discussion happens they bring it up to make you miserable and make you remember every mistake you have done in the past year.

WOMEN

Although not all women have the same above characteristics, those are the most commons ones and even thought we hate some of those stuff, we as men must try to comprehend that they are simply like that and must learn to work our way around those issues, because we simply cannot live without women.

Thanks For Reading Dont Forget To Become a Fan :)

Top 10 Things What Boys Like About Girls

1. How girls smile

We should admit, girls have something in their sweet smiles that captivate and mesmerize those around them. Girls can wear different smiles depending on the situation accordingly. For example, a cute smile when asking for a favor with a matching "pretty please" is different from a seductive smile, and so on.

2. How girls always smell so good

Girls, have you noticed how guys tend to breathe in your scent? Take note on the way they put their face into your hair and deeply inhale the fragrance whenever you hug or just lay your head near their head. Guys just love smelling.

3. How girls laugh

Girls love people with sense of humor. They want to spend time with funny guys. Laughter is the best medicine and there's always an element of surprise when it comes to how girls laugh. Notice how guys always find time to tease you and make fun of anything just to hear it, whether it sounds like a hyena or whatever. And take note, guys get so amazed at how girls can laugh even after crying. Not that they are insane though!

4. How girls take so long to get ready

Guys are just so fascinated at how girls can take forever to get ready. They tend to wonder what the hell have you been doing and they are left to wait with no choice. But guys are always so excited to see you after that long self-preparation. And they always forget the long time they have spent waiting because when you come out, you are just absolutely worth the wait.

5. How girls dress up

In connection with taking so long to get ready, girls are always known to be picky when it comes to the clothes they wear depending on the situation. Choosing the right combination to match the mood and the circumstance eats most of the time in their preparation. Notice when guys look at you and tells you how good you look in your clothes. They appreciate your fashion statement.

6. How girls put their make-up on

Depending again on the situation, girls know how to wear proper make-up. But notice how guys look at you whenever they see you put them on. They are somehow amazed at how you're doing it. Most of the time, they say you're much prettier without make-up or that you should just put light make-up to make your beauty look more natural.

7. How girls say "I love you"

Let's admit, girls are more creative in saying "I love you" than guys. Girls always find a million different ways to show and say their feelings to their special someone. And whether they admit or not, guys can get butterflies in their stomach whenever they are caught by surprise!

8. How girls hands fit perfectly in theirs

Girls always love to hold hands. Guys just can't imagine how both your hands perfectly fit together, thinking that it means you're meant for each other. Notice how guys play with your fingers and palms, and how they squeeze it every so often.

9. How girls have perfect waist where they wrap their arms around

Girls always love to be hugged. They also like to be held safe and secure. And guys love the feeling of you in their arms. Notice how guys hold you or hug you by the waist. They actually feel like they have the most precious thing in their hands. Then they squeeze tighter, not wanting to let go just yet.

10. How girls can be naturally sweet

We all know that girls have natural sweetness in their personalities. Guys just love the way girls treat them with thoughts running in the back of their minds: "aww, how sweet!" Notice how a guy reacts when you give them a sweet kiss or do anything sweet for that matter. It can drive them crazy!

Tips for Taking a Girl to the Prom

Some guys get excited about the prom and others don't. But what nearly all guys feel about the prom is nervous. It's nerve-wracking to get all dressed up in a stiff, uncomfortable suit and try to impress the girl that you're taking to the prom. There are all of these things that you probably don't know how to do so well yet, like tipping limo drivers and figuring out hotel room accommodations. Relax. Prom night is a little bit stressful, but it's also supposed to be a lot of fun.

Here are some tips for taking a girl to the prom which might make things a little bit easier:

• Plan in advance. Procrastination may work just fine with squeezing in your papers just before grades are due but it's a bad choice to make for planning the prom. Ask the girl out early, rent or buy your suit in advance, order her corsage, make dinner reservations and take care of all of the other details of prom before the date is actually upon you. Believe me, this will significantly reduce your anxiety. It will also impress your date because she'll feel like you've taken care of things for her and getting off on a good foot is going to make things easier.
• Clothes. Yes, you need to dress up for the prom. Some prom couples go an alternative route and where something untraditional to the prom. If you're thinking about that, you should ask your prom date before you do it. She might be a goth girl on most days but that doesn't mean that her dreams of a pretty prom dress don't exist. You want to know ahead of time if she's expecting you do be decked out in suit and tie or will be comfortable with something less traditional.
• Corsage. You need to buy your prom date a corsage. Even if she says she doesn't want one, buy it. It's a nice gesture. If she really hates it, you can always give it to your mom to save in the freezer; at least you're guaranteed to make one girl happy that way. Go to a local florist and have them explain the different types of corsages to you. They'll know what to get.
• Take flowers to her mother if you're picking her up. Mom and Dad are nervous about their little girl going off to prom. This makes things easier for all of you.
• Make little gestures throughout prom night to let your date know that you think she's special. That's what this night is all about. You can tell her she looks pretty, hold the door open for her, do "gentlemanly" things that you might not do on a normal day and it's perfectly acceptable.
• Take pictures. Formal and candid. You might not want to but you'll be glad you did.
• The issue of drugs and sex. Prom night is associated with partying. I'm not going to tell you to avoid drinking, drugs and sexual activity - that's for another time and place. What I will say is that you should know where you and the girl stand on these things before the prom night. It shouldn't be something you decide in the heat of the moment, under peer pressure. And always remember that if she says no - whether it's to drinking at a party or going further when you're making out - that means no and you need to respect that.
• Have fun. You may be nervous but you should have fun. Dance even though you think you don't know how. Mingle with friends but spend time with the girl. Go out afterwards and stay up late laughing. It's a night that you won't ever forget.

How to ask a girl for her number

All it takes is a "good" pick-up line

I am a sucker for a guy that will use a terribly terrible pick-up. Maybe it's because they're bold (or shameless) and friendly (or desperate), but I get a real kick out of a guy who isn't afraid to bust one out.

The other day a guy asked, "How much does a polar bear weigh?" I shrugged and he replied, "Enough to break the ice. Hi, I'm Mike." I was impressed/swept off my feet, and it was a guy I knew pretty well too (and should have expected this from in the first place).

There's nothing like a guy who will use a ridiculous pick-up line. To me, a guy that will go up to a girl and actually spurt that kind of cheese out of his mouth is bold, confident, silly with a sense of humour, and adorable... exactly the kind of guy I love (or love to know and make fun of).

However, these are the kinds of guys who may need some help (or may not care either way).

So here are some good pick-up lines for a guy to use in his dating endeavors (or fooleries), only because I have sympathy (or I can't wait to hear one used on me!)

Some real doozies

Am I dead, Angel? Cause this must be heaven!

Apart from being sexy, what do you do for a living?

Baicarumba...are those real?

Be unique and different, just say yes.

Can I flirt with you?

Damn girl, you have more curves than a race track.

Do you know karate? Cos damn it honey, your body is really kickin.

Excuse me. I'm from the FBI, the Fine Body Investigators, and I'm going to have to ask you to assume the position.

Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?

Greetings and salivations

Honey, I'm new in this town - dya think I could have directions to your house.

I hope you know CPR, cos you take my breath away!

I've got the ship, you've got the harbor ... what say we tie up for the night?

I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.

If you don't wanna have kids with me, then why don't we just practice?

Screw me if I am wrong, but haven't we met before?

That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap next to my bed.

Were you arrested earlier? It's gotta be illegal to look that good.

Sara's all-time favorite pick-up lines

Is that the sun coming up... or is that just you lighting up my world?

Is your last name Gillete cause your the best a man can get.

Do you want to make millions? Millions of babies?

I tripped on a kiss and fell in love with you.

If someone was to write a story about my life, the climax would be when I met you!

That outfit is horrible! Take it off right now!

Hey, how’s it going? Do you see my friend over there? He wants to know if you think I’m cute.

You’re a pot of gold in this enormous world and I’m just a little leprechaun.

Hey, if I kiss you, will I get slapped?

If you were a pill I'd overdose.

(Walk up to a girl, hold out your hand and say) "Would you mind holding on to this for me while I take a walk?"

If looks could kill you would be a weapon of mass destruction.

I bet my tongue can beat up your tongue.

If your beauty was like gas, my car would never need refilled.

Hey I just realized this, but you look a lot like my next girlfriend.

You're so pretty I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of you.

Is this the Matrix, because I think you're the One.

If you were president then your name would be Baberaham Lincoln.

I almost got arrested for smuggling these guns into Mexico! (Looks at arms).

They call me "milk" because I do a body good.

Is there an airport near by or is that my heart taking off?

You know your good enough to give my last name to.

What is on your butt?... My eyes!

If I had a dollar for every chick I'd seen as hot as you... I'd have one dollar!

Are you a parking ticket? (What?) You got fine written all over you.

(Pick up a pack of sugar that says "sugar" on it and say) "You dropped your nametag!"

Five Simple Things a Guy Can Do to Win a Girls Heart

How to win her heart

However it happened, the two of you are either dating or you, at least, very much want to be dating. You know she at least likes you - she's willing to be seen in public with you. On the other hand, you are in love. Your heart is hers, whether she knows it or not.

So how do you win her heart in return? By being romantic, attentive, fun, expressive, and for real. To be more specific:

1. Cook her a meal. Before you panic, let me just say that if you can read and understand this article, you can read and understand a basic cookbook. Sure, some of the terms may be unfamiliar, but they're usually explained somewhere within the pages. It doesn't have to be a fancy meal - baked chicken, a salad, some rice pilaf (from a box), a bottle of decent wine and some store-bought fancy chocolate anything, and she will be swept off her feet.

However, I would caution against serving anything cooked on a grill like steak or barbecue. Ditto pizza, nachos, or hot wings - even if they're homemade. Why? That stuff is considered "man food." The subliminal message of serving a girl "man food" is: "I consider you to be one of the guys," which is not what you want to say!

I would also advise you to scope out any dietary preferences or food allergies she has before you plan the menu. The time to find out she is a vegetarian is not when you set a pot roast down onto the table. The time to find out she is violently allergic to shrimp is not when you're on the way to the emergency room so she can be treated for anaphylactic shock. Don't try to make the meal a surprise; plan in advance and avoid embarrassment later. Plus, advance notice gives her the opportunity to tell all her friends, "He's going to cook me dinner! That's soromantic!" which will earn mucho brownie points for you in the friends' minds.

2. Find out what she likes to do and do it with her. Whether it's salsa dancing, watching old movies, or volunteering at a local animal shelter, if she's into it, you'd better at least try it. At minimum, she will appreciate your efforts to be part of her "world" and think you're the sweetest guy on the planet for letting her cry on your shoulder at the end of Casablanca. At best, the two of you will be well on the way to building a lifetime of shared memories.

3. If she has family nearby that she sees pretty regularly, learn how to get along with them. You don't have to like them, they're probably as weird as peanut-butter-flavored toothpaste, but they're her family. So be nice. Nice means go to family events when invited, mind your manners, dress appropriately, smile, and don't let her mother (sister, aunt, grandmother) get to you. And don't badmouth the family afterwards.

P.S. This suggestion also applies to any pets she might have. Even ones that yakk up hairballs in your shoes or try to romance your leg. If you want to win her heart, you'll take these little tokens of affection in the spirit they're being offered and not kick the offending critter across the room, verbally or (certainly not!) literally. On the other hand, if you are honestly, truly, life-threateningly allergic to her animal companion, you might want to let her keep her heart and let yourself keep breathing.

4. Disable the "male answer syndrome" button. Yes, you have one. The button works like this: you are presented with a problem by a fellow guy friend, co-worker or other acquaintance. You are then hardwired to come up with a few workable solutions to the problems.

If you don't know already, let me be the one to let you in on a little secret: when the girl of your dreams tells you about a personal, professional, or social problem, she is not, I repeat not looking for you to provide her with a solution. So why is she telling you? Because she's decided that you are a good candidate to offer what she most wants: commiseration and support. Many women, myself included, tackle their problems by "thinking out loud." Preferably with an audience (you) that will provide the proper feedback: lots of mmms, and uh-huhs, and the occasional wow, followed by - if you're lucky - lots of comforting hugs. But listen, really listen to her, and try to save your perfect solution until a) she asks for your advice or b) the end of eternity. Warning: she will know in a flash if you're pretending to listen but are really engrossed in whatever's on the tube or the Internet. And she will take her heart and go home.

5. Clean up nice once in a while. You don't always have to dress like you're going to Wal-Mart at two o'clock in the morning. Even if your Friday date is fast food and a movie, it wouldn't hurt to wear something better than your usual attire. Dressing nice for your girl sends a very strong message: "You're worth wearing (a tie, dress pants, not-sneakers, hair gel) for." Girls get the message, believe me. And we respond positively.

Notice that none of these suggestions require a lot of money, a nice car, a lucrative professional sports contract, or a closet full of designer suits. They simply require that you be you, and that you let her be, well, her.

So go out there and find a good cookbook! And don't forget to give her flowers every once in a while - especially if there's no real reason to do so!